Wednesday, April 12, 2006
So Incredibly Tired
You're probably all wondering what the heck happened to me. After Sierra's 30 day recovery from surgery, I had to go on a little recovery period of my own. Frankly, I have been too pooped to blog!
Under normal circumstances, I would not have been able to live on 3-4 hours sleep for several days in a row. I wouldn't have been able to hold up a 70 lb dog. I would not have been able to keep up with the medication, hot and cold compresses, and the constant comforting that Sierra needed.
I am often amazed how I find the energy and strength to get things done that are beyond my ability. I can say that in this case, Sierra was my motivation. How could I whine about how difficult my task was when she had woken up after surgery and found herself one leg short? How could I complain about my swollen fingers when ever step Sierra took was painful? How could I cringe at having to put compresses on Sierra's incision when she was having to learn how to walk all over again? My challenges were small in comparison to hers!
Somewhere deep inside, I was able to put myself aside and deal with her. Her ability to live a happy, comfortable life depended on me. I had my instructions and I had to follow them. No ifs, ands, or buts about it.
When the 14 day period was up, Sierra had her stitches removed. I was sure relieved when the Vet phoned and said "we'd" done a wonderful job. Sierra had healed beautiful and could start getting back to her normal life. She had another two week healing cycle and then she was on her own.
Now that the 30 days have passed I've found myself letting out a heavy sigh. I was so worried she would get hurt or I'd do something wrong. I know that I am not much of a nurse and having to do this put me through some stuff I would have rather not done. I made it--and so did Sierra. But, now that it's over, I find I've got no energy left for anything. The fatigue that normally plagues me seems twice as heavy. It seems like my body wants to give me all the discomfort it withheld for 4 weeks. So, I have to listen and take things slow. I'm not the healthiest to begin with. I've been able to stick to Sierra's program. Now it's time for a little down time so I can rebuild my own strength.
Under normal circumstances, I would not have been able to live on 3-4 hours sleep for several days in a row. I wouldn't have been able to hold up a 70 lb dog. I would not have been able to keep up with the medication, hot and cold compresses, and the constant comforting that Sierra needed.
I am often amazed how I find the energy and strength to get things done that are beyond my ability. I can say that in this case, Sierra was my motivation. How could I whine about how difficult my task was when she had woken up after surgery and found herself one leg short? How could I complain about my swollen fingers when ever step Sierra took was painful? How could I cringe at having to put compresses on Sierra's incision when she was having to learn how to walk all over again? My challenges were small in comparison to hers!
Somewhere deep inside, I was able to put myself aside and deal with her. Her ability to live a happy, comfortable life depended on me. I had my instructions and I had to follow them. No ifs, ands, or buts about it.
When the 14 day period was up, Sierra had her stitches removed. I was sure relieved when the Vet phoned and said "we'd" done a wonderful job. Sierra had healed beautiful and could start getting back to her normal life. She had another two week healing cycle and then she was on her own.
Now that the 30 days have passed I've found myself letting out a heavy sigh. I was so worried she would get hurt or I'd do something wrong. I know that I am not much of a nurse and having to do this put me through some stuff I would have rather not done. I made it--and so did Sierra. But, now that it's over, I find I've got no energy left for anything. The fatigue that normally plagues me seems twice as heavy. It seems like my body wants to give me all the discomfort it withheld for 4 weeks. So, I have to listen and take things slow. I'm not the healthiest to begin with. I've been able to stick to Sierra's program. Now it's time for a little down time so I can rebuild my own strength.
