Tuesday, May 09, 2006
I don't want to get up!
All the things I normally do suddenly seem like a heavy weight on my shoulders. Putting in my contacts and brushing my teeth seem like the worst things I could possible have to do that day. I'll hem and haw and procrastinate. Then I get those things done and I can't think of why I was fighting it.
Maybe I'm tired of the routine. I have that problem. Something like making my bed seems so pointless. I will sometimes get thoroughly disgusted with mundane tasks--so much so that I don't want to even look at them.
I do try to do things in a different way. Of course, it can be dangerous to change the order. I put in my contacts today and then got a phone call. It wasn't until I was walking the dog at lunch time that I realized I forgot to brush my teeth. Good thing I didn't meet up with any neighbors. They might have keeled over from my fungus breath. LOL
I do wonder why I resist things so much some days. I think sometimes it has to do with the fact that arthritis is such a drag. I have so many things I must do like put on hot pepper lotion, put on the braces, wear the special shoes, take my medication. I guess resisting routine is my way of trying to take control. It doesn't really do me any good though. It does feel good to be a bit rebellious even if I'm only rebelling against myself.